|
|
|
|
Full Play Text
Act I, Scene 1 DUKE ORSINO's palace.
Enter DUKE ORSINO, CURIO, and
other Lords;
|
| DUKE ORSINO | If music be the food of love, play on; Give me excess of it, that, surfeiting, The appetite may sicken, and so die. That strain again! it had a dying fall: O, it came o'er my ear like the sweet sound, That breathes upon a bank of violets, Stealing and giving odour! Enough; no more: 'Tis not so sweet now as it was before. O spirit of love! how quick and fresh art thou, That, notwithstanding thy capacity Receiveth as the sea, nought enters there, Of what validity and pitch soe'er, But falls into abatement and low price, Even in a minute: so full of shapes is fancy That it alone is high fantastical. |
| CURIO | Will you go hunt, my lord? |
| DUKE ORSINO | What, Curio? |
| CURIO | The hart. |
| DUKE ORSINO | Why, so I do, the noblest that I have: O, when mine eyes did see Olivia first, Methought she purged the air of pestilence! That instant was I turn'd into a hart; And my desires, like fell and cruel hounds, E'er since pursue me. |
| [Enter VALENTINE] | |
| How now! what news from her? | |
| VALENTINE | So please my lord, I might not be admitted; But from her handmaid do return this answer: The element itself, till seven years' heat, Shall not behold her face at ample view; But, like a cloistress, she will veiled walk And water once a day her chamber round With eye-offending brine: all this to season A brother's dead love, which she would keep fresh And lasting in her sad remembrance. |
| DUKE ORSINO | O, she that hath a heart of that fine frame To pay this debt of love but to a brother, How will she love, when the rich golden shaft Hath kill'd the flock of all affections else That live in her; when liver, brain and heart, These sovereign thrones, are all supplied, and fill'd Her sweet perfections with one self king! Away before me to sweet beds of flowers: Love-thoughts lie rich when canopied with bowers. |
| [Exeunt] |
| VIOLA | What country, friends, is this? |
| Captain | This is Illyria, lady. |
| VIOLA | And what should I do in Illyria? My brother he is in Elysium. Perchance he is not drown'd: what think you, sailors? |
| Captain | It is perchance that you yourself were saved. |
| VIOLA | O my poor brother! and so perchance may he be. |
| Captain | True, madam: and, to comfort you with chance, Assure yourself, after our ship did split, When you and those poor number saved with you Hung on our driving boat, I saw your brother, Most provident in peril, bind himself, Courage and hope both teaching him the practise, To a strong mast that lived upon the sea; Where, like Arion on the dolphin's back, I saw him hold acquaintance with the waves So long as I could see. |
| VIOLA | For saying so, there's gold: Mine own escape unfoldeth to my hope, Whereto thy speech serves for authority, The like of him. Know'st thou this country? |
| Captain | Ay, madam, well; for I was bred and born Not three hours' travel from this very place. |
| VIOLA | Who governs here? |
| Captain | A noble duke, in nature as in name. |
| VIOLA | What is the name? |
| Captain | Orsino. |
| VIOLA | Orsino! I have heard my father name him: He was a bachelor then. |
| Captain | And so is now, or was so very late; For but a month ago I went from hence, And then 'twas fresh in murmur,--as, you know, What great ones do the less will prattle of,-- That he did seek the love of fair Olivia. |
| VIOLA | What's she? |
| Captain | A virtuous maid, the daughter of a count That died some twelvemonth since, then leaving her In the protection of his son, her brother, Who shortly also died: for whose dear love, They say, she hath abjured the company And sight of men. |
| VIOLA | O that I served that lady And might not be delivered to the world, Till I had made mine own occasion mellow, What my estate is! |
| Captain | That were hard to compass; Because she will admit no kind of suit, No, not the duke's. |
| VIOLA | There is a fair behavior in thee, captain; And though that nature with a beauteous wall Doth oft close in pollution, yet of thee I will believe thou hast a mind that suits With this thy fair and outward character. I prithee, and I'll pay thee bounteously, Conceal me what I am, and be my aid For such disguise as haply shall become The form of my intent. I'll serve this duke: Thou shall present me as an eunuch to him: It may be worth thy pains; for I can sing And speak to him in many sorts of music That will allow me very worth his service. What else may hap to time I will commit; Only shape thou thy silence to my wit. |
| Captain | Be you his eunuch, and your mute I'll be: When my tongue blabs, then let mine eyes not see. |
| VIOLA | I thank thee: lead me on. |
| [Exeunt] |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | What a plague means my niece, to take the death of her brother thus? I am sure care's an enemy to life. |
| MARIA | By my troth, Sir Toby, you must come in earlier o' nights: your cousin, my lady, takes great exceptions to your ill hours. |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | Why, let her except, before excepted. |
| MARIA | Ay, but you must confine yourself within the modest limits of order. |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | Confine! I'll confine myself no finer than I am: these clothes are good enough to drink in; and so be these boots too: an they be not, let them hang themselves in their own straps. |
| MARIA | That quaffing and drinking will undo you: I heard my lady talk of it yesterday; and of a foolish knight that you brought in one night here to be her wooer. |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | Who, Sir Andrew Aguecheek? |
| MARIA | Ay, he. |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | He's as tall a man as any's in Illyria. |
| MARIA | What's that to the purpose? |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | Why, he has three thousand ducats a year. |
| MARIA | Ay, but he'll have but a year in all these ducats: he's a very fool and a prodigal. |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | Fie, that you'll say so! he plays o' the viol-de-gamboys, and speaks three or four languages word for word without book, and hath all the good gifts of nature. |
| MARIA | He hath indeed, almost natural: for besides that he's a fool, he's a great quarreller: and but that he hath the gift of a coward to allay the gust he hath in quarrelling, 'tis thought among the prudent he would quickly have the gift of a grave. |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | By this hand, they are scoundrels and subtractors that say so of him. Who are they? |
| MARIA | They that add, moreover, he's drunk nightly in your company. |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | With drinking healths to my niece: I'll drink to her as long as there is a passage in my throat and drink in Illyria: he's a coward and a coystrill that will not drink to my niece till his brains turn o' the toe like a parish-top. What, wench! Castiliano vulgo! for here comes Sir Andrew Agueface. |
| [Enter SIR ANDREW] | |
| SIR ANDREW | Sir Toby Belch! how now, Sir Toby Belch! |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | Sweet Sir Andrew! |
| SIR ANDREW | Bless you, fair shrew. |
| MARIA | And you too, sir. |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | Accost, Sir Andrew, accost. |
| SIR ANDREW | What's that? |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | My niece's chambermaid. |
| SIR ANDREW | Good Mistress Accost, I desire better acquaintance. |
| MARIA | My name is Mary, sir. |
| SIR ANDREW | Good Mistress Mary Accost,-- |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | You mistake, knight; 'accost' is front her, board her, woo her, assail her. |
| SIR ANDREW | By my troth, I would not undertake her in this company. Is that the meaning of 'accost'? |
| MARIA | Fare you well, gentlemen. |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | An thou let part so, Sir Andrew, would thou mightst never draw sword again. |
| SIR ANDREW | An you part so, mistress, I would I might never draw sword again. Fair lady, do you think you have fools in hand? |
| MARIA | Sir, I have not you by the hand. |
| SIR ANDREW | Marry, but you shall have; and here's my hand. |
| MARIA | Now, sir, 'thought is free:' I pray you, bring your hand to the buttery-bar and let it drink. |
| SIR ANDREW | Wherefore, sweet-heart? what's your metaphor? |
| MARIA | It's dry, sir. |
| SIR ANDREW | Why, I think so: I am not such an ass but I can keep my hand dry. But what's your jest? |
| MARIA | A dry jest, sir. |
| SIR ANDREW | Are you full of them? |
| MARIA | Ay, sir, I have them at my fingers' ends: marry, now I let go your hand, I am barren. |
| [Exit] | |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | O knight thou lackest a cup of canary: when did I see thee so put down? |
| SIR ANDREW | Never in your life, I think; unless you see canary put me down. Methinks sometimes I have no more wit than a Christian or an ordinary man has: but I am a great eater of beef and I believe that does harm to my wit. |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | No question. |
| SIR ANDREW | An I thought that, I'ld forswear it. I'll ride home to-morrow, Sir Toby. |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | Pourquoi, my dear knight? |
| SIR ANDREW | What is 'Pourquoi'? do or not do? I would I had bestowed that time in the tongues that I have in fencing, dancing and bear-baiting: O, had I but followed the arts! |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | Then hadst thou had an excellent head of hair. |
| SIR ANDREW | Why, would that have mended my hair? |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | Past question; for thou seest it will not curl by nature. |
| SIR ANDREW | But it becomes me well enough, does't not? |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | Excellent; it hangs like flax on a distaff; and I hope to see a housewife take thee between her legs and spin it off. |
| SIR ANDREW | Faith, I'll home to-morrow, Sir Toby: your niece will not be seen; or if she be, it's four to one she'll none of me: the count himself here hard by woos her. |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | She'll none o' the count: she'll not match above her degree, neither in estate, years, nor wit; I have heard her swear't. Tut, there's life in't, man. |
| SIR ANDREW | I'll stay a month longer. I am a fellow o' the strangest mind i' the world; I delight in masques and revels sometimes altogether. |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | Art thou good at these kickshawses, knight? |
| SIR ANDREW | As any man in Illyria, whatsoever he be, under the degree of my betters; and yet I will not compare with an old man. |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | What is thy excellence in a galliard, knight? |
| SIR ANDREW | Faith, I can cut a caper. |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | And I can cut the mutton to't. |
| SIR ANDREW | And I think I have the back-trick simply as strong as any man in Illyria. |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | Wherefore are these things hid? wherefore have these gifts a curtain before 'em? are they like to take dust, like Mistress Mall's picture? why dost thou not go to church in a galliard and come home in a coranto? My very walk should be a jig; I would not so much as make water but in a sink-a-pace. What dost thou mean? Is it a world to hide virtues in? I did think, by the excellent constitution of thy leg, it was formed under the star of a galliard. |
| SIR ANDREW | Ay, 'tis strong, and it does indifferent well in a flame-coloured stock. Shall we set about some revels? |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | What shall we do else? were we not born under Taurus? |
| SIR ANDREW | Taurus! That's sides and heart. |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | No, sir; it is legs and thighs. Let me see the caper; ha! higher: ha, ha! excellent! |
| [Exeunt] |
| VALENTINE | If the duke continue these favours towards you, Cesario, you are like to be much advanced: he hath known you but three days, and already you are no stranger. |
| VIOLA | You either fear his humour or my negligence, that you call in question the continuance of his love: is he inconstant, sir, in his favours? |
| VALENTINE | No, believe me. |
| VIOLA | I thank you. Here comes the count. |
| [Enter DUKE ORSINO, CURIO, and Attendants] | |
| DUKE ORSINO | Who saw Cesario, ho? |
| VIOLA | On your attendance, my lord; here. |
| DUKE ORSINO | Stand you a while aloof, Cesario, Thou know'st no less but all; I have unclasp'd To thee the book even of my secret soul: Therefore, good youth, address thy gait unto her; Be not denied access, stand at her doors, And tell them, there thy fixed foot shall grow Till thou have audience. |
| VIOLA | Sure, my noble lord, If she be so abandon'd to her sorrow As it is spoke, she never will admit me. |
| DUKE ORSINO | Be clamorous and leap all civil bounds Rather than make unprofited return. |
| VIOLA | Say I do speak with her, my lord, what then? |
| DUKE ORSINO | O, then unfold the passion of my love, Surprise her with discourse of my dear faith: It shall become thee well to act my woes; She will attend it better in thy youth Than in a nuncio's of more grave aspect. |
| VIOLA | I think not so, my lord. |
| DUKE ORSINO | Dear lad, believe it; For they shall yet belie thy happy years, That say thou art a man: Diana's lip Is not more smooth and rubious; thy small pipe Is as the maiden's organ, shrill and sound, And all is semblative a woman's part. I know thy constellation is right apt For this affair. Some four or five attend him; All, if you will; for I myself am best When least in company. Prosper well in this, And thou shalt live as freely as thy lord, To call his fortunes thine. |
| VIOLA | I'll do my best To woo your lady: |
| [Aside] | |
| yet, a barful strife! Whoe'er I woo, myself would be his wife. |
|
| [Exeunt] |
| MARIA | Nay, either tell me where thou hast been, or I will not open my lips so wide as a bristle may enter in way of thy excuse: my lady will hang thee for thy absence. |
| Clown | Let her hang me: he that is well hanged in this world needs to fear no colours. |
| MARIA | Make that good. |
| Clown | He shall see none to fear. |
| MARIA | A good lenten answer: I can tell thee where that saying was born, of 'I fear no colours.' |
| Clown | Where, good Mistress Mary? |
| MARIA | In the wars; and that may you be bold to say in your foolery. |
| Clown | Well, God give them wisdom that have it; and those that are fools, let them use their talents. |
| MARIA | Yet you will be hanged for being so long absent; or, to be turned away, is not that as good as a hanging to you? |
| Clown | Many a good hanging prevents a bad marriage; and, for turning away, let summer bear it out. |
| MARIA | You are resolute, then? |
| Clown | Not so, neither; but I am resolved on two points. |
| MARIA | That if one break, the other will hold; or, if both break, your gaskins fall. |
| Clown | Apt, in good faith; very apt. Well, go thy way; if Sir Toby would leave drinking, thou wert as witty a piece of Eve's flesh as any in Illyria. |
| MARIA | Peace, you rogue, no more o' that. Here comes my lady: make your excuse wisely, you were best. |
| [Exit] | |
| Clown | Wit, an't be thy will, put me into good fooling! Those wits, that think they have thee, do very oft prove fools; and I, that am sure I lack thee, may pass for a wise man: for what says Quinapalus? 'Better a witty fool, than a foolish wit.' |
| [Enter OLIVIA with MALVOLIO] | |
| God bless thee, lady! | |
| OLIVIA | Take the fool away. |
| Clown | Do you not hear, fellows? Take away the lady. |
| OLIVIA | Go to, you're a dry fool; I'll no more of you: besides, you grow dishonest. |
| Clown | Two faults, madonna, that drink and good counsel will amend: for give the dry fool drink, then is the fool not dry: bid the dishonest man mend himself; if he mend, he is no longer dishonest; if he cannot, let the botcher mend him. Any thing that's mended is but patched: virtue that transgresses is but patched with sin; and sin that amends is but patched with virtue. If that this simple syllogism will serve, so; if it will not, what remedy? As there is no true cuckold but calamity, so beauty's a flower. The lady bade take away the fool; therefore, I say again, take her away. |
| OLIVIA | Sir, I bade them take away you. |
| Clown | Misprision in the highest degree! Lady, cucullus non facit monachum; that's as much to say as I wear not motley in my brain. Good madonna, give me leave to prove you a fool. |
| OLIVIA | Can you do it? |
| Clown | Dexterously, good madonna. |
| OLIVIA | Make your proof. |
| Clown | I must catechise you for it, madonna: good my mouse of virtue, answer me. |
| OLIVIA | Well, sir, for want of other idleness, I'll bide your proof. |
| Clown | Good madonna, why mournest thou? |
| OLIVIA | Good fool, for my brother's death. |
| Clown | I think his soul is in hell, madonna. |
| OLIVIA | I know his soul is in heaven, fool. |
| Clown | The more fool, madonna, to mourn for your brother's soul being in heaven. Take away the fool, gentlemen. |
| OLIVIA | What think you of this fool, Malvolio? doth he not mend? |
| MALVOLIO | Yes, and shall do till the pangs of death shake him: infirmity, that decays the wise, doth ever make the better fool. |
| Clown | God send you, sir, a speedy infirmity, for the better increasing your folly! Sir Toby will be sworn that I am no fox; but he will not pass his word for two pence that you are no fool. |
| OLIVIA | How say you to that, Malvolio? |
| MALVOLIO | I marvel your ladyship takes delight in such a barren rascal: I saw him put down the other day with an ordinary fool that has no more brain than a stone. Look you now, he's out of his guard already; unless you laugh and minister occasion to him, he is gagged. I protest, I take these wise men, that crow so at these set kind of fools, no better than the fools' zanies. |
| OLIVIA | Oh, you are sick of self-love, Malvolio, and taste with a distempered appetite. To be generous, guiltless and of free disposition, is to take those things for bird-bolts that you deem cannon-bullets: there is no slander in an allowed fool, though he do nothing but rail; nor no railing in a known discreet man, though he do nothing but reprove. |
| Clown | Now Mercury endue thee with leasing, for thou speakest well of fools! |
| [Re-enter MARIA] | |
| MARIA | Madam, there is at the gate a young gentleman much desires to speak with you. |
| OLIVIA | From the Count Orsino, is it? |
| MARIA | I know not, madam: 'tis a fair young man, and well attended. |
| OLIVIA | Who of my people hold him in delay? |
| MARIA | Sir Toby, madam, your kinsman. |
| OLIVIA | Fetch him off, I pray you; he speaks nothing but madman: fie on him! |
| [Exit MARIA] | |
| Go you, Malvolio: if it be a suit from the count, I am sick, or not at home; what you will, to dismiss it. |
|
| [Exit MALVOLIO] | |
| Now you see, sir, how your fooling grows old, and people dislike it. |
|
| Clown | Thou hast spoke for us, madonna, as if thy eldest son should be a fool; whose skull Jove cram with brains! for,--here he comes,--one of thy kin has a most weak pia mater. |
| [Enter SIR TOBY BELCH] | |
| OLIVIA | By mine honour, half drunk. What is he at the gate, cousin? |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | A gentleman. |
| OLIVIA | A gentleman! what gentleman? |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | 'Tis a gentle man here--a plague o' these pickle-herring! How now, sot! |
| Clown | Good Sir Toby! |
| OLIVIA | Cousin, cousin, how have you come so early by this lethargy? |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | Lechery! I defy lechery. There's one at the gate. |
| OLIVIA | Ay, marry, what is he? |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | Let him be the devil, an he will, I care not: give me faith, say I. Well, it's all one. |
| [Exit] | |
| OLIVIA | What's a drunken man like, fool? |
| Clown | Like a drowned man, a fool and a mad man: one draught above heat makes him a fool; the second mads him; and a third drowns him. |
| OLIVIA | Go thou and seek the crowner, and let him sit o' my coz; for he's in the third degree of drink, he's drowned: go, look after him. |
| Clown | He is but mad yet, madonna; and the fool shall look to the madman. |
| [Exit] | |
| [Re-enter MALVOLIO] | |
| MALVOLIO | Madam, yond young fellow swears he will speak with you. I told him you were sick; he takes on him to understand so much, and therefore comes to speak with you. I told him you were asleep; he seems to have a foreknowledge of that too, and therefore comes to speak with you. What is to be said to him, lady? he's fortified against any denial. |
| OLIVIA | Tell him he shall not speak with me. |
| MALVOLIO | Has been told so; and he says, he'll stand at your door like a sheriff's post, and be the supporter to a bench, but he'll speak with you. |
| OLIVIA | What kind o' man is he? |
| MALVOLIO | Why, of mankind. |
| OLIVIA | What manner of man? |
| MALVOLIO | Of very ill manner; he'll speak with you, will you or no. |
| OLIVIA | Of what personage and years is he? |
| MALVOLIO | Not yet old enough for a man, nor young enough for a boy; as a squash is before 'tis a peascod, or a cooling when 'tis almost an apple: 'tis with him in standing water, between boy and man. He is very well-favoured and he speaks very shrewishly; one would think his mother's milk were scarce out of him. |
| OLIVIA | Let him approach: call in my gentlewoman. |
| MALVOLIO | Gentlewoman, my lady calls. |
| [Exit] | |
| [Re-enter MARIA] | |
| OLIVIA | Give me my veil: come, throw it o'er my face. We'll once more hear Orsino's embassy. |
| [Enter VIOLA, and Attendants] | |
| VIOLA | The honourable lady of the house, which is she? |
| OLIVIA | Speak to me; I shall answer for her. Your will? |
| VIOLA | Most radiant, exquisite and unmatchable beauty,--I pray you, tell me if this be the lady of the house, for I never saw her: I would be loath to cast away my speech, for besides that it is excellently well penned, I have taken great pains to con it. Good beauties, let me sustain no scorn; I am very comptible, even to the least sinister usage. |
| OLIVIA | Whence came you, sir? |
| VIOLA | I can say little more than I have studied, and that question's out of my part. Good gentle one, give me modest assurance if you be the lady of the house, that I may proceed in my speech. |
| OLIVIA | Are you a comedian? |
| VIOLA | No, my profound heart: and yet, by the very fangs of malice I swear, I am not that I play. Are you the lady of the house? |
| OLIVIA | If I do not usurp myself, I am. |
| VIOLA | Most certain, if you are she, you do usurp yourself; for what is yours to bestow is not yours to reserve. But this is from my commission: I will on with my speech in your praise, and then show you the heart of my message. |
| OLIVIA | Come to what is important in't: I forgive you the praise. |
| VIOLA | Alas, I took great pains to study it, and 'tis poetical. |
| OLIVIA | It is the more like to be feigned: I pray you, keep it in. I heard you were saucy at my gates, and allowed your approach rather to wonder at you than to hear you. If you be not mad, be gone; if you have reason, be brief: 'tis not that time of moon with me to make one in so skipping a dialogue. |
| MARIA | Will you hoist sail, sir? here lies your way. |
| VIOLA | No, good swabber; I am to hull here a little longer. Some mollification for your giant, sweet lady. Tell me your mind: I am a messenger. |
| OLIVIA | Sure, you have some hideous matter to deliver, when the courtesy of it is so fearful. Speak your office. |
| VIOLA | It alone concerns your ear. I bring no overture of war, no taxation of homage: I hold the olive in my hand; my words are as fun of peace as matter. |
| OLIVIA | Yet you began rudely. What are you? what would you? |
| VIOLA | The rudeness that hath appeared in me have I learned from my entertainment. What I am, and what I would, are as secret as maidenhead; to your ears, divinity, to any other's, profanation. |
| OLIVIA | Give us the place alone: we will hear this divinity. |
| [Exeunt MARIA and Attendants] | |
| Now, sir, what is your text? | |
| VIOLA | Most sweet lady,-- |
| OLIVIA | A comfortable doctrine, and much may be said of it. Where lies your text? |
| VIOLA | In Orsino's bosom. |
| OLIVIA | In his bosom! In what chapter of his bosom? |
| VIOLA | To answer by the method, in the first of his heart. |
| OLIVIA | O, I have read it: it is heresy. Have you no more to say? |
| VIOLA | Good madam, let me see your face. |
| OLIVIA | Have you any commission from your lord to negotiate with my face? You are now out of your text: but we will draw the curtain and show you the picture. Look you, sir, such a one I was this present: is't not well done? |
| [Unveiling] | |
| VIOLA | Excellently done, if God did all. |
| OLIVIA | 'Tis in grain, sir; 'twill endure wind and weather. |
| VIOLA | 'Tis beauty truly blent, whose red and white Nature's own sweet and cunning hand laid on: Lady, you are the cruell'st she alive, If you will lead these graces to the grave And leave the world no copy. |
| OLIVIA | O, sir, I will not be so hard-hearted; I will give out divers schedules of my beauty: it shall be inventoried, and every particle and utensil labelled to my will: as, item, two lips, indifferent red; item, two grey eyes, with lids to them; item, one neck, one chin, and so forth. Were you sent hither to praise me? |
| VIOLA | I see you what you are, you are too proud; But, if you were the devil, you are fair. My lord and master loves you: O, such love Could be but recompensed, though you were crown'd The nonpareil of beauty! |
| OLIVIA | How does he love me? |
| VIOLA | With adorations, fertile tears, With groans that thunder love, with sighs of fire. |
| OLIVIA | Your lord does know my mind; I cannot love him: Yet I suppose him virtuous, know him noble, Of great estate, of fresh and stainless youth; In voices well divulged, free, learn'd and valiant; And in dimension and the shape of nature A gracious person: but yet I cannot love him; He might have took his answer long ago. |
| VIOLA | If I did love you in my master's flame, With such a suffering, such a deadly life, In your denial I would find no sense; I would not understand it. |
| OLIVIA | Why, what would you? |
| VIOLA | Make me a willow cabin at your gate, And call upon my soul within the house; Write loyal cantons of contemned love And sing them loud even in the dead of night; Halloo your name to the reverberate hills And make the babbling gossip of the air Cry out 'Olivia!' O, You should not rest Between the elements of air and earth, But you should pity me! |
| OLIVIA | You might do much. What is your parentage? |
| VIOLA | Above my fortunes, yet my state is well: I am a gentleman. |
| OLIVIA | Get you to your lord; I cannot love him: let him send no more; Unless, perchance, you come to me again, To tell me how he takes it. Fare you well: I thank you for your pains: spend this for me. |
| VIOLA | I am no fee'd post, lady; keep your purse: My master, not myself, lacks recompense. Love make his heart of flint that you shall love; And let your fervor, like my master's, be Placed in contempt! Farewell, fair cruelty. |
| [Exit] | |
| OLIVIA | 'What is your parentage?' 'Above my fortunes, yet my state is well: I am a gentleman.' I'll be sworn thou art; Thy tongue, thy face, thy limbs, actions and spirit, Do give thee five-fold blazon: not too fast: soft, soft! Unless the master were the man. How now! Even so quickly may one catch the plague? Methinks I feel this youth's perfections With an invisible and subtle stealth To creep in at mine eyes. Well, let it be. What ho, Malvolio! |
| [Re-enter MALVOLIO] | |
| MALVOLIO | Here, madam, at your service. |
| OLIVIA | Run after that same peevish messenger, The county's man: he left this ring behind him, Would I or not: tell him I'll none of it. Desire him not to flatter with his lord, Nor hold him up with hopes; I am not for him: If that the youth will come this way to-morrow, I'll give him reasons for't: hie thee, Malvolio. |
| MALVOLIO | Madam, I will. |
| [Exit] | |
| OLIVIA | I do I know not what, and fear to find Mine eye too great a flatterer for my mind. Fate, show thy force: ourselves we do not owe; What is decreed must be, and be this so. |
| [Exit] |
| ANTONIO | Will you stay no longer? nor will you not that I go with you? |
| SEBASTIAN | By your patience, no. My stars shine darkly over me: the malignancy of my fate might perhaps distemper yours; therefore I shall crave of you your leave that I may bear my evils alone: it were a bad recompense for your love, to lay any of them on you. |
| ANTONIO | Let me yet know of you whither you are bound. |
| SEBASTIAN | No, sooth, sir: my determinate voyage is mere extravagancy. But I perceive in you so excellent a touch of modesty, that you will not extort from me what I am willing to keep in; therefore it charges me in manners the rather to express myself. You must know of me then, Antonio, my name is Sebastian, which I called Roderigo. My father was that Sebastian of Messaline, whom I know you have heard of. He left behind him myself and a sister, both born in an hour: if the heavens had been pleased, would we had so ended! but you, sir, altered that; for some hour before you took me from the breach of the sea was my sister drowned. |
| ANTONIO | Alas the day! |
| SEBASTIAN | A lady, sir, though it was said she much resembled me, was yet of many accounted beautiful: but, though I could not with such estimable wonder overfar believe that, yet thus far I will boldly publish her; she bore a mind that envy could not but call fair. She is drowned already, sir, with salt water, though I seem to drown her remembrance again with more. |
| ANTONIO | Pardon me, sir, your bad entertainment. |
| SEBASTIAN | O good Antonio, forgive me your trouble. |
| ANTONIO | If you will not murder me for my love, let me be your servant. |
| SEBASTIAN | If you will not undo what you have done, that is, kill him whom you have recovered, desire it not. Fare ye well at once: my bosom is full of kindness, and I am yet so near the manners of my mother, that upon the least occasion more mine eyes will tell tales of me. I am bound to the Count Orsino's court: farewell. |
| [Exit] | |
| ANTONIO | The gentleness of all the gods go with thee! I have many enemies in Orsino's court, Else would I very shortly see thee there. But, come what may, I do adore thee so, That danger shall seem sport, and I will go. |
| [Exit] |
| MALVOLIO | Were not you even now with the Countess Olivia? |
| VIOLA | Even now, sir; on a moderate pace I have since arrived but hither. |
| MALVOLIO | She returns this ring to you, sir: you might have saved me my pains, to have taken it away yourself. She adds, moreover, that you should put your lord into a desperate assurance she will none of him: and one thing more, that you be never so hardy to come again in his affairs, unless it be to report your lord's taking of this. Receive it so. |
| VIOLA | She took the ring of me: I'll none of it. |
| MALVOLIO | Come, sir, you peevishly threw it to her; and her will is, it should be so returned: if it be worth stooping for, there it lies in your eye; if not, be it his that finds it. |
| [Exit] | |
| VIOLA | I left no ring with her: what means this lady? Fortune forbid my outside have not charm'd her! She made good view of me; indeed, so much, That sure methought her eyes had lost her tongue, For she did speak in starts distractedly. She loves me, sure; the cunning of her passion Invites me in this churlish messenger. None of my lord's ring! why, he sent her none. I am the man: if it be so, as 'tis, Poor lady, she were better love a dream. Disguise, I see, thou art a wickedness, Wherein the pregnant enemy does much. How easy is it for the proper-false In women's waxen hearts to set their forms! Alas, our frailty is the cause, not we! For such as we are made of, such we be. How will this fadge? my master loves her dearly; And I, poor monster, fond as much on him; And she, mistaken, seems to dote on me. What will become of this? As I am man, My state is desperate for my master's love; As I am woman,--now alas the day!-- What thriftless sighs shall poor Olivia breathe! O time! thou must untangle this, not I; It is too hard a knot for me to untie! |
| [Exit] |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | Approach, Sir Andrew: not to be abed after midnight is to be up betimes; and 'diluculo surgere,' thou know'st,-- |
| SIR ANDREW | Nay, my troth, I know not: but I know, to be up late is to be up late. |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | A false conclusion: I hate it as an unfilled can. To be up after midnight and to go to bed then, is early: so that to go to bed after midnight is to go to bed betimes. Does not our life consist of the four elements? |
| SIR ANDREW | Faith, so they say; but I think it rather consists of eating and drinking. |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | Thou'rt a scholar; let us therefore eat and drink. Marian, I say! a stoup of wine! |
| [Enter Clown] | |
| SIR ANDREW | Here comes the fool, i' faith. |
| Clown | How now, my hearts! did you never see the picture of 'we three'? |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | Welcome, ass. Now let's have a catch. |
| SIR ANDREW | By my troth, the fool has an excellent breast. I had rather than forty shillings I had such a leg, and so sweet a breath to sing, as the fool has. In sooth, thou wast in very gracious fooling last night, when thou spokest of Pigrogromitus, of the Vapians passing the equinoctial of Queubus: 'twas very good, i' faith. I sent thee sixpence for thy leman: hadst it? |
| Clown | I did impeticos thy gratillity; for Malvolio's nose is no whipstock: my lady has a white hand, and the Myrmidons are no bottle-ale houses. |
| SIR ANDREW | Excellent! why, this is the best fooling, when all is done. Now, a song. |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | Come on; there is sixpence for you: let's have a song. |
| SIR ANDREW | There's a testril of me too: if one knight give a-- |
| Clown | Would you have a love-song, or a song of good life? |
| SIR TOBY BELCH | A love-song, a love-song. |
| SIR ANDREW | Ay, ay: I care not for good life. |
